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Belongil Bistro, Byron Bay

Belongil Bistro


I wandered into this hip looking little café after sussing the breakfast menu and thinking I wanted to give it a go. We were at the beach, this place is really close to the beach, I wanted breakfast… I guess it was just one of those moments where all of my planets aligned… Now, I do not have the power of our good lord or ESP so I don’t know what was wrong, but from the get go the floor staff just seemed a little vacant. Like they would rather be somewhere else, or maybe they just didn’t like the morning shift, or maybe they had a staff party the previous night, or maybe they heard that the circus was in town and they haboured a secret desire to run away and become carnies (yes, I am starting to get a little predictable aren’t i. seriously, I have nothing against carnies, I love carnies, some of my friends are carnies, it’s just… well, they’re carnies). Whatever it was, they were not on the ball… certainly no teenage prom date right there. I contemplated offering them money for a smile, but thought this would not actually aid the situation. I waited a while to be seated after being asked if I was just waiting for a takeaway. Are you effing kidding me? I had just appeared at the place (and I am not a “blend into the crowd” kind of guy) with two small children. You clearly know I am not just waiting for a take away. We were seated and then our coffee order hit the table almost immediately. One small issue there… we hadn’t ordered any coffee yet. All good. The waiter was onto the next table. Then a table behind us got their coffees and the father (I’m just making assumptions now but he was the older guy with an older girl and two young people) remarks that they have been waiting for half an hour for their coffees. He was nice about it and clearly didn’t want to complain but the waiter gave him a stiff one straight up the bum and sent him on his way, and by that I mean he told him there was a bit of a mix up and quickly shuffled off (the drinks roulette happened a few times while we were there). Case closed. All right, I thought to myself, the floor may be having a bad day, but… well, no buts really. This is HOSPITALITY.

Jennee and our friend Claire (aka, Claire with the mad hair flair) joined the table and we ordered some breakfast.

We waited patiently, enjoyed a laugh and basked in the smell of sunscreen and medium-well baked tourists. It certainly is a nice spot to hang out…

Big Bistro Breakfast, eggs, bacon, sausage, hash brown, roast tomato and toast with relish 22.5

Big Bistro Breakfast, eggs, bacon, sausage, hash brown, roast tomato and toast with relish 22.5

Ezekiel bread and poached eggs, the biblical sprout bread with hummus, spinach, alfalfa sprouts and relish 15.0

Ezekiel bread and poached eggs, the biblical sprout bread with hummus, spinach, alfalfa sprouts and relish 15.0

The monster bacon and egg burger. 9 bucks

The monster bacon and egg burger. 9 bucks

I love Campo coffee

I love Campos coffee

And then the food arrived. Not by bus or train, but a previously unseen waitress, with a smile on her face and time for pleasant conversation. This girl was evidently habouring not a single desire to join the circus. I must say the food was good. Damn good. It was all cooked perfectly and potion sizes were worth every penny (If only I had pennies to pay them with). The only thing I would (and will) complain about was the toast; no butter, no oil, no lube. Rookie error. Rookie error. But like I said (you would have noticed if you hadn’t have just skim-read this gripping expose), every thing else was magic. The menu was interesting and read well, eggs were cooked perfectly (always a good start at breakfast) and it looked good on the plate. In summary I would say it seemed like the chefs were keen to cook some good food for people. This is one of my favourite qualities in a chef. I mean, if you don’t like cooking food for people you are insulting the stereotype of the intelligence of chefs everywhere and you should probably f**k off back to Maccas, or maybe a shitty assed old roadhouse that still thinks rabbit pelts are legal currency, so you may be with your bretheren. Whoa, when did this turn into a rant about shitty chefs? Maybe I should try to focus a little more on the point at hand – Belongil Bistro.

Great location, great food, average hospitality in a town where a lot of places seem to offer great location, average hospitality and average food!

…and now we’re going for a swim. Stupid not to really, considering the beach is only 20 meters away.

8 comments on “Belongil Bistro, Byron Bay

  1. Great looking food. The service would have started me out on the wrong foot, redeemable only by applying large quantities of Vieux Clicquot.

    1. … and that’s where we went wrong! 🙂 Still a nice spot though…

  2. How freakin’ big is that burger?!?! Lose the alfalfa (I don’t understand that stuff!), lube the toast and you have a great looking breakfast…apart from that, your paragraphs are way too long and since when do you censor your expletives?!?! 😛

    1. Hahaha. Yeah was trying something different. Didn’t really work too well for me though so shit and fuck are back on the menu!!!

      1. Good to hear although I also tried something new in my last post about deep frying my hand (and chicken) and didn’t use one swear word at all – I know right…weird!

      2. 🙂 how is that hand?

      3. Looks awful and will probably scar – but that could end up looking really cool 🙂

      4. Or there’s always a tattoo ready to cover it 🙂

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