My wife has a set of cards entitled “fifty things to do before you die”, or something similar. Or, as I just found out, “fifty things to do once in a lifetime”, to be absolutely correct. Once or twice we have sat around the table with friends after having a wine or two, and magically someone will spy the cards on the table and everyone has a go, counting how many of the fifty they have achieved already and working out what the chances of them completing them all before they die may be. Cool. A real conversation starter.

Now this may not be a very amusing anecdote… actually it is definitely not an amusing anecdote, but whatever man! Eff this shit. What was I even on about… the cards. One of the things they suggested you may need to do before you move on to the next realm, is have a midnight picnic. And that’s all I wanted to say.

Here is my midnight picnic. Try it out some day, with or without ulterior motives.

• Terrine and chutney, we’ve done these in earlier posts.
• Frittata.
• Smoked salmon, cream cheese, dill and thin slices of red onion on rye bread or sourdough. I generally won’t eat it, but I know it tastes good and a lot of people like it. Also a great one to have if you have ulterior motives.
• Fennel and cabbage remoulade*, or slaw if you want the lowest common denominator.
• Marinated olives. The ones I told you to keep in your fridge.
• Cheese. Do yourself a favour and try some tomme goats cheese.
• Bread.
• Olive oil and sea salt and pepper (mix the salt and ground pepper together so you don’t need to take a grinder).
• Booze.
• Strawberries dipped in chocolate if you have an ulterior motive cos let’s face it, they’re easy to make, and make a big difference to your chances!
• You better remember candles or some other kind of romantic light source. Maybe glow in the dark condoms?

*remoulade. Traditionally a mayonnaise based dressing with capers, pickles and anchovies. Similar to what we now call tartare sauce I guess. Now refers to basically any dressing or salad that is made up primarily of one or more julienned** or chiffonade** vegetables bound with a mayonnaise.

**might have to look those ones up for yourself. You can’t expect me to do all the work surely?