Asian people are magical

I don’t want to alarm the general public or cause young children to run and hide when they come across Asian’s in the street… quite the opposite in fact.

The magic I speak of should be marveled, embraced and placed on a small pedestal. Perhaps a pedestal crafted from gold or a wood worthy of a king (definitely not pine).

This magic isn’t the remarkably uncool kind that has men of questionable motives performing second rate tricks at children’s parties, I’m not trying to conjure a picture of Mr. Fong (excuse the stereotypical name, its for story telling purposes) with doves flying out of his sleeves or finding loose change behind ears, or perhaps the image you see is Mr. Fong dressed up like merlin with a pointy hat and silky robe… NO, this isn’t the magic I speak of!!!!

My definition of magic is quite simply…

‘Something that can’t be explained and brings a smile to my face’

This is quite clearly not from a dictionary, but you get the vibe of the magic I speak of…

If for some obscure reason you still haven’t the foggiest idea what I’m jabbering on about, I’ll give you a clue and this clue is made up of two very special words…

Dim sum

Now we’re on the same page, if you haven’t been for dim sum then you shouldn’t be reading this blog, if you are still reading it then you should know that we most likely will never be friends until you’ve had a good summing.

Dim sum is amazing, its social, its cheap, its dericous (Asian for delicious) and yes of course its magical… because you enter the room made up of lets face it second hand furniture from a restaurant that went bankrupt in 1986 and its packed, you’ve been queuing on the street for 30 minutes, you’re so hungry you contemplate stealing food from people plates as you walk past, but you put your faith in the magical people that usher you to your table, then the magic happens!!

You blink, maybe you just gesture a little, it may be a nod but BAM, next thing you know the tables are full of an array of incredible food, they don’t even need to whip off a sheet to give effect to the trick these magicians perform their magic in plain sight, right in front of you. They don’t stop for applause, they never stop, and on to the next trick it’s called the never-ending teapot, brilliant!

The food is so tasty from the salt and pepper squid to the shanghai dumplings (dumplings filled with hot stock, yum), the bbq pork buns, the chicken feet, the kai lan, the many many dumplings of every kind all made even tastier with the chilli oil that is dished out like communion at mass.

As if these clearly magical acts aren’t enough to wow you the greatest trick is saved for the cash register, the master magician places the card full of inconceivable scribbling’s in one hand and taps away for what seems like an hour as they count up what you crazy kids have managed to eat… then there is a silence, the tension build’s, you could cut the air with a knife (not that there is one in sight mind you) then he reveals the cost of 8 peoples lunch, a lunch that has left most of the 8 in a slight food coma, the cost is only $160… that is only $20 a person for all you kids playing at home… Now that is magic, how in all that is holy can what has just happened and happens ever weekend be classed as anything but magic?

There are a few rules’ to take into account when creating a ‘DIM SUM CREW’

1. First people at table have to order squid and kai lan (Chinese veg)
2. The lazy susan should never fully stop moving
3. The bill is always split evenly (don’t be a tight arse)
4. Who ever guesses the exact amount of the bill does not have to pay

That is all, simple fair and should be a part of you life, I have several dim sum crews…

But a big shout out to the original crew, the summing posse… G-money, Carla da Bruce, Gail & Wee-man, Dave, Tech-funk, Roxright, Lauren and Angry Buda, the first and only winner of the guess the check right… Much respect ☺

Now its Saturday morning and I’m off to get me a good summing ☺