A new burger joint within the distance that I may ride my donkey from my house and not need to use public facilities on the way is the type of thing that is going to get me excited. I also get quite excited by midget porn … and midget wrestling… just midget anything really. Or should I be saying little people? Small people? I don’t bloody know. Somebody hook a brother up with the low down eh.

So,
1. New burger joint
2. Close enough to our house
3. Got a bit of a weird little thing going on in my brain where it feels like there is a few of those aforementioned little people in my brain and they are trying to punch their way out from the inside. (I’m not sure what the heck happened but I do remember going to our good friends wedding, having a beer, owning the dance floor and the microphone, having another beer, groping the bride’s mother, or was that the father? Yep, definitely the father. Had another beer, paid way too much for a taxi home, had another beer, retired gracefully to bed, woke up with said pain in head. Best I can deduce with nary the capabilities or funds needed to purchase a junior detective’s kit so I may take the investigation further, is some bastard did something to my brain while I was sleeping. Not cool… not cool at all)
4. New burger joint
5. They have deep fried pickles

That little list meant that I had 5 reasons to get my ragged ass out of bed on this day, and take that same ass for a leisurely drive through the winding roads that make up these back hills of the far north coast of NSW, and what a journey it was.

We found WilliamsBurg perched quite aptly on the corner of William St and another street that I can’t remember the name of (but if you’re super curious it is the one that runs along the beach front) in the little beachside town of Lennox Head and with that I found my self a new reason to go on and dare I say, love. We made our way inside, sat down, looked at menus and ordered some stuff… pretty much the things you would expect of someone going into a restaurant…

There was plenty of booze to choose from including local new kid on the block, the Top Shed, amber liquid on tap (but I will be honest and tell you that my face did choose an apple and guava juice due to the pummeling it had taken from old matey booze the night previous), and then there were the burgers. These burgers were almost godly. They could’ve almost done themselves more justice by calling the place heaven… if that wasn’t the shittiest name you could actually call anything except actual heaven… These guys truly know how to treat a piece of meat (nudge nudge, wink wink). This place should be the template for what a gourmet burger joint should strive to be – a well cooked burger put together with a slew of local ingredients produced by some of the regions finest, and the sides to back it up. I don’t know if I am conveying this point successfully but I think these guys make REALLY EFFING GOOD BURGERS.

After visiting WilliamsBurg for the first time recently I declared on other social media that there was not one single thing about my experience that I did not love, which was almost entirely true, but then I just remembered the mayonnaise. The mayonnaise was not as excellent as every other thing I tasted. The mayonnaise tasted kinda like some eggs and oil emulsified together (which we as a reality cooking show watching public know is a damn good start, right?) but then it didn’t seem to have too much else in it… like mustard or vinegar or seasoning. But that was the only little thing, like the only little thing. Yeah, I could have let it go, but I didn’t get the moniker “the mayonnaise nazi” by letting things like this slide 😉

Back to the good stuff.

Seba and I both went straight for the jugular of “the William” (beef patty, bacon, double cheese, lettuce, bacon jam, special sauce and deep fried pickles $16) which was without a doubt the best burger I have ever eaten in my life and the benchmark to which I will measure all burgers from here on in, and I do believe that’s all I need to say about that. (PS Laura’s Mess, something similar to this will be going down at the burger challenge my friend)

Jennee opted for “the Moocher” with it’s beer battered local fresh fish (today it was blue eye cod), ‘slaw and tartare sauce ($15.5). simple and delicious… or simply delicious… or something.

Obi just wanted chips, which is highly unusual when there’s a burger on offer, but you know what? This was one of those days that if one of the kids want to have just chips for lunch, they can have just chips for lunch. So we got those chips, which were so crisp and tasty and just damn good, and we also got some crispy battered onion strips of awesome just to round it all off.

We all left so very very satiated and possibly a little smarter and better looking, the healing qualities of a damn fine burger fully realised.

I will go back to WilliamsBurg very soon. In fact, I feel that if it were just a wee bit closer, I would go there very often and very quickly turn into a red bearded Elvis type character.

Corner of Williams St and Pacific Parade (yeah I looked it up for you), Lennox Head, NSW. Go there now