A few paragraphs about why I’m proud to be a human being

Recently or maybe a long, long time ago (cos let’s face it, you’re not going to know either way) I spoke to a couple of people who have been making me pround to be at the same level on the evolutionary ladder, which is not a feeling I have that often. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think I’m extra special or anything. I just think that people, in general, are pretty (not pretty) stupid and wasteful. I love my mum though.

Anyway, first was my Uncle Rob. He has a regular pumpkin party when he or one of his friends have an abundance of pumpkins in their garden. How good is that? Everyone cooks a dish using pumpkin! Get new ideas off people… use your surplus fruit or veg… put your keys in the hat… err, I mean… I’m pretty sure that’s the gist of the conversation we had. It was one of those nights where you (and by you, I mean me) end up at Rob and Lizzies house and crack on with a few bottles of wine.

The second was my friend Morgan who, best I can figure from the scant details he has forwarded to me, has a pecan cook up and cook off and competition on his street every year. It appears everyone on the street rapes a giant pecan tree (all at the same time, just so it knows that it is happening) and makes all sorts of dishes from her seed. I’m just making this up as I go, just for something different. I just like to keep it fresh, if you know what I’m saying. YOU DO? Oh thank god. I was so worried that I was just dribbling to my self (even though I can see you watching me), and no-one understands me. You don’t know how good you have made me feel. I think I can probably tackle another week now… I hope… what? Pecans. Yes, pecans.
Yes it seems my friend may be having a great old time at the expense of his (or his neighbours’) pecan tree.

So I’m going to have a little fucking party of my own. And my party is going to have stupid looking little hats n shit. It’s going to be awesome. AWESOME! And I’m only going to invite super heroes and ex-prime ministers.

I’m just not to sure what I’m going to use for the theme…