Jungle curry goat…

Good enough to make me gloat

Hot enough to take you by the throat

Definitely worth more than a single groat

(Is this what my life has become?) And that shall be the jingle for my new goat curry café. Or maybe it won’t be. In any case I’d need to get a goat curry café to warrant making up a jingle and I don’t see that happening any time soon. Granted I am not Nostradamus but still, it just doesn’t appear on the horizon for me.

Something that is quite literally on the horizon at the moment is a cracking afternoon sky. I’m basking in the warm glow of my first glass of really old grape juice (doesn’t sound so sexy now, eh) and preparing the evening meal.

This is holiday life for me. Hash tag that shit!

After the cracking lunch we had at Spirit House a couple of days back Jennee really wanted “something spicy, Thai and exotic”. Now, for Jennee to say that to me was a pretty brave move, and I do feel I really should’ve taken it a lot further then I did, but you know what? Sometimes I am just a genuinely nice guy, so jungle curry of goat it was!

JUNGLE CURRY OF GOAT

1-1.5kg piece of goat leg or shoulder, bone in for extra flavour, cut into 4-5 pieces on the bandsaw (your butcher will do this for you unless he is an absolute prick, in which case why the hell are you still using him???)

250g green beans or snake beans if you can get them, prepped into edible sized pieces

2 tomatoes, cut into wedges

2 tablespoons sugar. Castor will do if you don’t have palm sugar

2 cups stock

2 tablespoon tamarind pulp

1 tablespoon fish sauce, plus a little more if needed

4 kaffir lime leaf

1 lime for that final pornographic flourish

Red onion, pickled cucumber and steamed rice to serve

• Cook off the goat with the curry paste in a pot or large pan over a medium heat
• Once it starts to smell lovely and aromatic (like your best friends mums undies) add sugar and cook for a minute or two until it starts to caramelise. Add stock, tamarind, fish sauce and kaffir leaf and cover. Simmer over low heat for probs 2 hours, maybe a little more if it’s not doing its thing. Give it a stir every 20 minutes. If it starts to thicken up too much add a splash of water, we’re going to sort this baby out at the end
• After two hours check if the meat is tender. You can do this by poking it with your finger or a stick. If it is ready it will yield quite easily
• Remove the lid and simmer down until almost at desired consistency (I suggest a slightly thick gravy), add beans and tomatoes and simmer for another 10 minutes
• Get that puppy on the table, top with some thinly sliced red onion and have the other garnishes on the side
• Write a poem about how much you like to gloat when you cook goat because it really floats your boat… or probably don’t

PASTE

1 brown onion, diced

3 long green chilli, sliced

3 dried long red chilli

1 tablespoon grated ginger

4 cloves garlic, chopped

1 stalk lemongrass, sliced, white part only

1 bunch coriander, roots and stems washed and chopped for paste. Leaves reserved for garnish

1 teaspoon white peppercorns, pounded in a mortar

A splash of oil to get the party started… Friday night styles… in the back garage… hmmm

• Blitz everything for the paste until it is a paste like consistency