Chilli condiments for an abundance of chillies

Short and sweet. Straight in and straight out. This is just a few recipes for chilli condiments. That’s all it is. No amusing anecdotes or humorous little musings about the world according to me.

Before you make stuff with an abundance of chillies, you need an abundance of chillies. If you don’t have your own chilli bush weighty with an abundance of spicy good times, go and steal a heap of chillies from your neighbour’s chilli bush. Maybe leave them a little thank you note so you don’t feel too bad about the thievery.

OK. Now let’s get loaded and make us some chilli condiments.

CAPSICUM CHILLI CHUTNEY

This is good on burgers, terrine, cheese and anything else you would like it to be on

2x 400 g tin crushed tomatoes
6 long red chilli, deseed*, slice
1 brown onion, diced
6 red capsicum, diced
1 knob ginger, grated
5 cloves garlic, chopped
500 g brown sugar
100 ml fish sauce
250 ml red wine vinegar

Get a pan onto a medium heat. Add a splash of oil and then saute chilli, onion, capsicum, ginger and garlic until softened.
Add sugar and cook out until starting to bubble and caramelise.
Add tomatoes, fish sauce and vinegar
turn heat to low and simmer for 45(ish) minutes, until starting to thicken and bubble like lava.
Chutney will last for a few months in the fridge.

CAPSICUM CHILLI JAM

Dip chips in this one, it loves a piece of grilled pork belly or fish with rice, or just spread it on bread.

8 red capsicum, diced
1 red onion, peeled, diced
1kg cherry or whatever tomatoes
6 long red chilli, deseeded* and chopped
1 bunch each of mint, coriander and thai basil, leaves picked
6 cloves garlic, chopped
1 knob ginger, grated
¾ cup fish sauce
2 cups palm sugar or castor sugar if that’s what you’ve got

Get a pan onto a medium heat. Add a splash of oil a sauté capsicum & onion until they are starting to caramelise.
Turn heat to low, add all other ingredients except sugar & fish sauce, and simmer for 1 hour.
Add sugar & fish sauce and simmer for a further 15 minutes.
is it bubbling like lava? Yep. Perfect.
Allow to cool a little and then blitz** and pass***.
Chilli jam will last for a few weeks in the fridge.

CHILLI SAMBAL

This is pretty hot but try a little bit in a curry or stir-fry, or just with some steamed rice, fish sauce and crisp eshallots. Delicious.

500g long red chilli, chop
2 brown onion, peeled, medium dice
5 cloves garlic, fine dice
50 ml fish sauce
½ cup palm or castor sugar
150 ml rice vinegar

Get a pan onto a medium heat. Add a splash of oil and saute onion, garlic and chilli until soft.
Turn heat to low, add all other ingredients and cook out for a further 15 minutes.
Allow to cool a little and then blitz**.
Sambal will last for a few weeks in the fridge.

*If you like a bit of spice in your life you should try this house just down the road from me. Heaps of people go there a night and they all put their keys into a hat, and then…
What I meant to mention was that if you like a little more spice you can definitely leave the seeds in.

**Be damn well careful when blitzing hot chilli sauces. That shit is going to let you know if it gets in your eye or on your wee-wee. Although you definitely shouldn’t be blitzing hot chilli sauce with your wee-wee out.
And while I’m at it, don’t touch your wee-wee if you have chilli on your fingers. It effing well hurts like a bitch and that shit don’t wash off.

***Pass. No. this does not mean you get to move on to the next question. In the commercial kitchen it means you take your sauce, soup or stock and pass it through a sieve, so it is smooth and clear of impurities. Just like my speech.