Food thievery

Food thievery is our bread and butter, it’s the building blocks of our cooking lexicon, it’s page 22 of our next book, it’s the new chicken dish on the winter menu and to be exact, it’s the recipe in this post I’m about to write.

So is it wrong?

No absolutely not!

And for all of those twat chef’s out there with little to no confidence and extremely small penis’ (or vagina’s? not sure what the correct female version of small penis would be? Most likely, huge vagina?) get over it… it is such a complement for me if someone enjoys one of my dishes so much that they want to emulate it. I’m not saying I would like the restaurant next door to copy my entire menu, but to think you actually created something completely new is absurd…. Unless you’re a crazy Spanish son of a bitch with a test tube and way too much time.

I took my good friend and chef out for dinner the other week. This is something you should all do (I don’t mean I want you all to call up Alex and ask her out as that get weird real quick. What I do mean is if you work In a kitchen and you don’t all hate the sight of each other, go out for dinner every now and again).

This has many purposes…

  1. You get to steal heaps of ideas
  2. You can talk about food a lot with out boring the tits off of your guests
  3. You get to learn what your colleagues ethos on food is

And the most important…

  1. You get to eat delicious food and drink tasty wine

We choose ‘Jackson’s’ restaurant here in Perth, it has for many years been a favourite of mine and it still delivered (not like with a scooter and heat bag).

The menu was a 8 course degustation which we added a few extra courses onto, because quite simply we could, so we did J. Along with the superb food and exquisite company we partook in several alcoholic beverages, I won’t go into great detail about the food as It was all good but nothing really stood out… this is not to say it wasn’t superb, but the wheel wasn’t reinvented on this particular night.

My favourite dish was a simply cheese course, which I liked so much I’m actually using it on a menu for this weekend… it was a ‘walnut tart with gorgonzola’. There were a few other items on it, but this is how I steal things… I liked the concept so I have made up my own take of it. I’ve made a walnut tart (recipe below) and for the recipe I looked through my books and the interweb and found a few versions, so I took the bits I like from all of them, one said to put in raisins… “Raisins are so effing last year I’m gonna use currents” I said (plus I already had currents and couldn’t be bothered going back to the shop, you just witnessed how a dish is created J), and as for the remaining components of this dish I know I will put gorgonzola with the tart and an apple balsamic glaze I made a while back, but I’ll leave final assembly to the last minute and hope I can channel greatness or at least bluff my way through (most likely the latter).

Blind baking the shit out of my pastry... like a boss!

Blind baking the shit out of my pastry… like a boss!

Yummy mixture

Yummy mixture

Pre oven tart

Pre oven tart

Finished tart

Finished tart

Walnut tart

For this you can make individual tartlets or one big fuck off tart, like I did J

I hope by now you all know how to make pastry, roll pastry and blind bake pastry… if you don’t then I suggest you go to you-tube and learn that shit as I have no time or the inclination to teach you all… plus I’m pretty sure we taught you already, unless this is the first time you have been to our blog… then in that case where the hell have you been?

So here is the filling recipe to whack into the tart case/cases…

  • Beat together 1egg, 2/3 cup brown sugar, 1 tablespoon butter until it is pale and creamy
  • Add the scrapings of 1 vanilla pod and ¼ cup currents
  • Crush 1 & ¼ cups of walnuts by hand or with a rolling pins and whack that in the mix
  • Finish it off with a small amount of orange zest (about a ¼-1/2 of an orange depending on size)
  • Now mix well and place in still hot blind bake pastry case
  • Bake at 160c for 25-30 minutes
  • Sorted!

I reckon this would be delicious with ice cream, with cheese, with poached peach or quince as a small starter… it can be whatever you want it to be….

“No body puts walnut tart in the corner”

*It’s seriously good to have you back bro, Grazza McFilthy Mouth