Paul’s Caul… Chasing the egg dragon

If it aint got a runny yolk get it the fuck out of there
If it aint got a runny yolk get it the fuck out of there

I am writing this still high as a kite. I’m like a duck outta china town… and I already want my next fix… but it’s only 10am on a Saturday morning, should I wait until lunch time? Should I wait until tomorrow morning? What does society dictate is an acceptable amount of time between breakfasts?

I mean seriously does any meal take place in such a relaxed state? Cooking breakfast is such a cathartic exercise… of course I’m taking about breakfast on your days off, as breakfast on a work morning can fuck right off, there is nothing cathartic about weekday breakfast… but I digress, back to the glorious weekend breakfasts… the following is the tale of the creation of my favourite breakfast. This particular version will have a little bacon, avocado and a chilli number with some eggs that have had a good poaching, all kicking back on some bbqed bacon bread… why is it a version? Well on another day eggs beni will be my favourite breakfast and on the next it will be black pudding and anything, then it will be a full cooked with hash browns and so on and so forth.

It’s the entire equation that has to be achieved for my favourite breakfast to culminate in the perfect storm of greatness and get my endorphins racing and in turn making me ‘chase the egg dragon’

The equation in its simple form…

Coffee + Rage + Part of a pig + Runny egg yolks

I’ll break that shit down for you….

Coffee = must be good, make it how ever you feel necessary, if you don’t like coffee then I simply don’t trust you, leave now!

Rage = this speaks of the music show on abc, do not get violent it will NOT help make a pleasant experience, important to note that rage can be replaced with friends, family and conversation in general.

Part of a pig = well it is what it is, bacon, pork belly, black pudding, square sausage how ever you want your swine it will always be divine (I just busted that shit freestyleez)

Runny egg yolks = there is a myriad of ways to get to the desired finale of vibrant yolk erupting from the center and embracing its new surrounding and creating a fusion of flavours blanketing over them and bringing everyone’s best attributes to the fore ground, I like to poach, I’m a poacher and proud.

I figure you’ll all gonna be only semi awake whilst attempting the following recipe so I will simplify the shit out of it…

• Turn on rage or maybe gets some friends (start this several years before the morning in question)
• Fill your kitchen with the aroma of coffee beans being ground, this sets the mode, so instant coffee will not do.
• Get a poaching pot on the stove, large pot, lots of water with a generous splash of vinegar, simmer that shit
• Light bbq or heat large pan or griddle

Bacon bread
Bacon bread
Layer that puppy up
Layer that puppy up

Ingredient list
1. Bacon
2. Good eggs, organic free range are best
3. Chilli jam/candied chilli… sweet chilli if you must
4. Nice slice of bread
5. Avocado

• Cook bacon on the bbq, as well as the bread, let it soak up as much bacon love as possible
• Once bread has broken free of its cocoon of cooking and metamorphosed into toast, remove from heat and spread with chilli jam and avocado (I don’t care how you achieve this just make some decisions for yourselves)
• Start to poach your egg or eggs, you know the drill, simmering water, swirled into a vortex, egg cracked into the center of the pot and allowed to simmer for a couple of minutes, until it holds shape then boom… shit be poached
• You guessed it, toast, chilli jam, avo then bacon and eggs, now all that’s needed is salt, pepper and your face

This combo of flavours makes a killer sandwich also with rocket or spinach raw and dressed in lemon juice… yum

• So you now should be enjoying a nice hot coffee, listening to a song you forgot you even liked bellowing from the TV and an egg yolk introducing him self to your chosen ingredients du jour.
• Best start to any day

23 responses to “Paul’s Caul… Chasing the egg dragon”

  1. I find poached eggs difficult. But I married an expert egg poacher so I have no problems. Poached eggs must be white set, yolks oozy to make a sauce for whatever else is on your plate. That is the law. Or at least it should be.

  2. There’s nothing like a wonderful weekend or holiday breakfast – this looks so good! This morning I went out for breakfast and it was perfect: great coffee, toasted pumpkin bread, perfectly poached eggs, maple glazed bacon, spinach and mushrooms – perfect start to the day 🙂

  3. raw egg yolk is perhaps the most disgusting thing in the world. i only eat hard egg yolks, and a real chef would cook my eggs this way because that is the way i have asked them to be cooked. only a dickhead would be a snob about poaching eggs hard – probably the same dickhead who also won’t cook steak well done.

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