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First you need Phil. Phil is a guy I work with and he likes gardening. Phil grows vegetables and makes pickles and preserves, and makes his own butter, cheese and yoghurt to boot. And yes, Phil is available ladies! Phil also has the tongue of a salty old sea dog… mostly because he is a salty old sea dog so, as you could most likely conclude for yourself, we can hold a conversation just fine. Phil and I sometimes trade vegetables and pickles and stuff… but not bodily fluids. I like Phil but I do not like Phil and quite frankly you offend me just by thinking those thoughts. Not that man on man action offends me. I have many gay friends. It is a fact that you cannot work in the hospitality industry without making friends with a gay man or two. Actually, I find it quite appealing… I really need to move on now…

So this week Phil gave me a pile of cavolo nero and corn. That, coupled with a post from my friend at Cooking in Sens, made my brain decide that my hands would be conjuring up some kind of consumable meal with chicken thighs, cavolo nero and corn. The three C’s, if you will.

And this recipe is about chicken thighs with the bone in and the skin on, by the way folks. Too many people in this world are freaked out by bone and fat. Well I am all about the fatty bone! This is no time to be a pussy about these things. This is the time to embrace the flavour… feel the love… touch yourself… gnaw on the moist thigh… hmmm

This chicken is just begging to be put in the oven

This chicken is just begging to be put in the oven

The chicken loved it's time in the oven and is now asking to be put in my belly

The chicken loved it’s time in the oven and is now asking to be put in my belly

Get in my belly chicken. Get in my belly

Get in my belly chicken. Get in my belly

CHICKEN THIGHS (for 4)
8 chicken thighs, bone in, skin on
Zest of one lemon (save the zest-less lemon for the roasting pan)
A handful of parsley, chopped
Seasoning
Oil
Chopped mint to serve
• Rub the chicken thighs with lemon zest, parsley and seasoning. Rub them like you want them. Rub them like you mean it. Rub them like a dirty old man in a big coat rubs himself in the local play ground…
• Put the chicken into a roasting pan and then go and give yourself a good flogging for being so pervy with it. Quarter the zest-less lemon and chuck that in there too
• Roast chicken at 200C with a bit of oil. 20-30 minutes should do the trick, depending on the size of your thighs. No, I did not just say, “You look fat in those pants!” Damn…
• Plate it up with some pilaf, chopped mint and a wedge of lemon if you have some floating about

PILAF (enough for the 4 peeps for dinner plus enough for rice salad for 4 or so the next day)
This is the first time I have actually measured a pilaf out all properly and correct so it should be bang on the money. I even used a timer and everything!
1 onion, diced
1 bunch cavolo nero, sliced
5 cobs corn, kernels sliced from the cob
1 head of broccoli, cut into florets (I had it in the fridge so it’s going in there)
2 cups basmati or long grain rice
1.25lt chicken stock (it’s pretty easy to make a good stock. You can handle that one by now, yeah?), hot
Seasoning
Oil or butter
• Sauté the onion in oil or butter until it starts to soften
• Add seasoning and the other vegetables and cook out for another couple of minutes
• Add the rice and stock. Cover and simmer over a medium heat for 8 minutes
• Remove from heat and let pilaf sit, lid on, for another few minutes
• Done
• Damn you are getting good at this!