First, a side note if you will entertain the notion; Please be aware that I have not been sleeping heaps lately due to the large body of people who have massed in this area like bugs around one of those fluro zapper lights, and are clearly all starving. Famished. Haven’t eaten nary as much as a small crumb for days.
We are at the mercy of these consumers… or should that be customers?
This is not the industry to enter if you are looking for a lazy holiday season. I work and then I work some more and then I sleep… and that shit is well and truly on repeat. When I wake up it feels like the Acme Concrete Co. has dumped a load of it’s finest in the corner of my eyes. I noticed an SES (State Emergency Service) recovery helicopter circling yesterday morning trying to spot survivors in the rubble. They sent in goddam sniffer dogs! Sniffer dogs!
Needless to say, this past week has not been jam packed with the most comprehendible moments of my life. So when I wrote this little number I thought I was doing a great job… or at least OK, until I re-read it and realised I seem to have written it in point form. I can’t change it, I don’t know how.
Yes, we’re back to the salsa thing. I told you already that summer is all about the salsa for me… well, that and the all the cooling off and rehydrating that needs to be done. Just in case you are simple, cooling off and rehydrating if definitely code for something.
I am so into this salsa thing I am actually considering enrolling for salsa dancing lessons just so there is more salsa in my life… and for a chance to finally meet Paul Mercurio. What a guy…
As I was pondering the whole salsa thing I came across a recipe for mojo chicken. I was multi-tasking the hell out of life as I pondered and trawled the interweb at the same time.
Please remember that a good salsa will spice up your dinner table like a good salsa would spice up a boys weekend away. Just to clear it up for you (and me too), the second salsa would be referring to the dance and it should also be made clear that you will probably want to pay a young lady dressed as some kind of scantily clad Penelope Cruz type character (or just Penelope Cruz I guess) to do the salsa, and not go for the not-very-sexy rendition of the salsa as performed by one of your drunken mates.
I will be doing a mojo ham this Christmas. That makes me excited. I am also excited by hot wax and vacuum attachments but I don’t think we need to get into that right now.
MOJO CHICKEN (serves 6-8)
2kg chicken marylands/ pieces
½ cup fresh orange juice, plus the zest of 1 orange
¼ cup fresh lime juice, plus the zest of 1 lime
4 cloves garlic, crushed
2 teaspoons dried oregano
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1 teaspoon chilli flakes
A splash of olive oil
Seasoning
• This is really good cooked over med-low coals for 30 minutes or so, turning regularly and basting with remaining marinade
• If have neither fire nor technology needed to cook on it a hot oven will do the trick. 200C for 30 minutes, baste, turn etc
PINA COLADA SALSA
½ medium fresh pineapple, diced (you need 2 cups or so of diced pineapple)
2 shallots or ½ red onion, diced
¼ cup shredded coconut
¼ cup coconut cream
½ long green chilli, deseeded and diced finely
10-12 mint leaves, chiffonade
A pinch of brown sugar
A splash of rum if you feel like getting real
½ – 1 lime, juiced
Seasoning
• Combine all ingredients in a food processer and pulse twice for a second or two to break it up just a touch
• If you don’t have a food processer you should go to the shop and buy one. Alternately you can dice everything nice and finely, and then mix thoroughly to combine
• Allow salsa to sit for ten minutes or so before serving so all of the ingredients can get to know each other properly
• Get that puppy on the chicken… or some prawns, a piece of pork or Christmas ham
• Thank me later
foodisthebestshitever 
15 responses to “Mojo Chicken (or Christmas Ham… you still have time) with Pina Colada Salsa”
This is so going to be made this summer!!! Earmarked it, bookmarked it, will pin it, whatever it takes.
Have a Happy Christmas!
Do it Ging. You won’t be disappointed.
Happy merry Christmas and all the best to you and yours 🙂
Cheers.
Ahh, poor tired cheffy fella. Imagine Jimmy Buffet is singing you a lullaby ‘If you like Piña Coladas, getting caught in the rain’ whilst your wee cheffy eyes are propped up by teeny tiny matchsticks as you cook delicious food for those hoardes of hungry people. Mojo ham and this salsa sounds super tasty. You are almost there. Merry Christmas Mr Food, your Sunday posts make me laugh my cheery behind off.
Oh I’m there my friend. Thanks for the pity (I think).
I was thinking about that song the whole time I was writing that… And I’m still singing it in my head.
I’m gonna get my ham in the smokers today and drink beer and watch the deliciousness happen. Yeeeeew 🙂
Very good looking opening shot….fucking excellent…I can taste and smell it from here:)
They are some photo props I will definitely take from you my friend! Cheers 🙂
Oh man a coal barbecue. That mojo marinade sounds fab. So summery and perfect for the charcoal grill. Yum. Just yum.
Agreed. Just agreed 🙂
HAHAHA!
Love the title of this post!
The choice is obvious, great post!
Wow. I though I did a quite average job but thanks D. Might even treat myself to an early beer after that compliment 🙂
Yessir..
i know a good thing when i see it.
*thumbs up* homie!
🙂
Hey buddy … I haven’t been around the ol’ cyberspace water cooler much these past coupla months but … I’m back and I just wanted to reach out across the miles and wish you a very Merry Christmas and all the best in 2015.
Stay hungry friend 🙂
Straight back at you my meat eating brother. All the best!! 🙂
[…] yeah, and I did make that mojo ham with the pina colada salsa. Smoked my own ham and the whole package (not my “whole package”, I feel I should add. More of […]